1. Every time you hear about a newly discovered planet, you demand NASA to name it Arrakis.
2. You wanted to major in bioengineering so that you could secretly create a sandworm and set it free in the Sahara Desert.
3. You exclaim “kull wahad!” (“I am profoundly stirred”) every time you’re surprised.
4. You claim “Zensunni” or “Bene Gesseret” as your religion of choice.
5. Your political party is House Atreides.
6. Whenever you point to a picture of a kangaroo rat, you say, “Muad’Dib”.
7. You think 1965 was the best year in the history of the world.
8. You think 1986 was the worst year in the history of the world.
9. You add cinnamon spice to everything you drink. It’s the closest you’ll get to mélange.
10. You request that your eyes (not just the iris – ALL of your eye) be dyed blue at the beauty parlor.
11. Whenever you ride the train, you pretend the engineer is a guild navigator.
12. You want a copy of the Orange Catholic Bible.
13. If you ever have twins, you’ll name them Leto and Ghanima.
14. You recite the Litany Against Fear every time you give a speech.
15. You prefer to wear a stillsuit to the beach.
16. You shun computers because you’re training to become a mentat.
17. You still resent your high school history class for never discussing The Butlerian Jihad.
18. You use “the voice” whenever you want your children to obey you.
19. You make all your dates take the Gom Jabbar test.
20. When flying, you prefer to travel by ornithopter.
21. In your will, you want all your money to go to the Herbert estate when you die.
22. You constantly send copies of your script for a Dune movie to every studio you can think of. And you won’t stop until they send you an acceptance letter.
23. You’re always walking without rhythm.
24. You shout “kanly!” every time you have a disagreement.
25. You forged your own crysknife in shop class.
26. You demand everyone in your book club read all the Dune books – including the ones by Brian Herbert and Kevin J. Anderson. That’s right. All 15 of them.
27. Sting has issued a restraining order against you.
28. You play matchmaker to everyone you know in the hope that they will produce a Kwisatz Haderach.
29. You perform prana-bindu every morning after you get out of bed.
30. Your doorbell plays the Main Theme from the 1984 movie.