9 Dinosaur Books to Read (That Aren’t “Jurassic Park”)

May 15th was National Dinosaur Day. It’s been said that the reason dinosaurs went extinct is because they didn’t read. But they sure make for memorable literary protagonists. So to celebrate Dinosaur Day, let’s look at nine memorable titles about our prehistoric pals.

Note: I will leave out Jurassic Park because it was probably the 1st title that popped into your head when you hear the word “dinosaur literature” and both the book and the films it inspired have been done to death (though I’d still like to wish it a happy 25th anniversary).

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The Lost World (1912)

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

 

 

 

You know him best as the creator of Sherlock Holmes but Doyle also wrote this novel that popularized the concept of a “hidden world” where dinosaurs, prehistoric creatures and even early humans survived extinction and lived undetected from modern civilization for millennia.

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The Land That Time Forgot (first published in serial form in 1918, then published as a novel in 1924)

Edgar Rice Burroughs

Following in the footsteps of Doyle, Burroughs also wrote about an undiscovered world where dinosaurs were alive and well, but set the story against the backdrop of World War 1 and U boat warfare.

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Dinosaur Tales (1983)

Ray Bradbury

I have never listened to anyone who criticized my taste in space travel, sideshows and gorillas. When this occurs I pack up my dinosaurs and leave the room.

Five stories, one poem and illustrations by Steranko, Moebius and William Stout, make up this unique collection of every dino story penned by the master himself. These include “The Fog Horn”, “A Sound of Thunder” and “Besides a Dinosaur, Whatta Ya Wanna Be When You Grow Up?” Despite being published by Barnes and Noble Books, I found this hidden treasure at Half Price Books.

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The Dinotopia Series (1992-2007)

James Gurney

When I was in elementary school, Dinotopia mania was at its peak, thanks to all the merchandise many of my male classmates were taking with them to school (like folders and backpacks). Why I didn’t beg my mother for some Dinotopia swag is beyond me. Maybe because I hadn’t read the book. In fact I didn’t read the series until I was in college(!) and I fell madly in love with James Gurney’s lush, Pre-Raphaelite influenced artwork. I even used one of the procession scenes as a wallpaper for my office computer when I worked as a school attendance clerk and received a lot of complements from passing co-workers. Part travelogue and part adventure story, Dinotopia tells the story of scientist Arthur Denison as he and his son wash upon a mysterious island where dinosaurs and humans live in peaceful interdependence.

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Dinosaur Fantastic (1993)

Edited by Mike Resnick and Martin H. Greenberg

From Goodreads: Mike Resnick and Martin H. Greenberg have called upon such gifted writers as Robert Sheckley, Pat Cadigan, Frank M. Robinson, Judith Tarr, Mercedes Lackey, Larry Dixon, Bill Fawcett, Katherine Kerr, David Gerrold, and Kristine Kathryn Rusch to create these twenty-five stories of the most terrifying and fascinating creatures to ever inhabit the Earth: the dinosaurs. From their native Jurassic landscape to your own backyard, from their ancient mastery of the planet to modern-day curiosities trapped in an age not their own, from the earth-shaking tyrannosaur to the sky-soaring pterodactyl, here are unforgettable tales-some poignant, some humorous, some offering answers to the greatest puzzle of prehistory. But all are certain to capture the hearts and imaginations of dinosaur lovers of all ages.

I can’t tell you what stories are in the anthology but I hope to read it someday.

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Anonymous Rex (2000)

Eric Garcia)

Dinosaurs disguised as (human) detectives to determine whodunnit. A notable entry in the “hard boiled sci-fi” subgenre.

Xenozoic Tales a.k.a. Cadillacs and Dinosaurs (1987-1994)

Mark Schultz

I remember seeing CBS promos for this show (Cadillacs and Dinosaurs) in the early ’90s (“IN YOUR EYE!!!”) but I didn’t know it was based on a comic (Xenozoic Tales) until now. This video below explains how the cartoon and the comic differ (and why the show failed miserably):

While TV Tropes gives more info on the comic/franchise. Another title I look forward to reading someday.

Age of Reptiles (1993-2015)

Ricardo Delgado

One day I googled “Ricardo Delgado” and I got some muscled guy in a thong. Oops. With all of that bodybuilding and posing, I don’t think he has the time to draw dino comics. So if you ever run into him don’t ask him to sign your copy of Age of Reptiles, a series published by Dark Horse about the everyday struggles of various dinosaurs throughout the – you guessed it – Age of Reptiles. There’s been four titles published so far: Tribal Warfare, The Hunt, The Journey and Ancient Egyptians. The most notable aspect of the series is that there’s no words or sounds. The stories rely on the pictures alone.

Oh and this is the Ricardo Delgardo who created the series.

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Dinosaurs vs Aliens (2012)

Grant Morrison

Did you know that during the Mesozoic Era an alien invasion was thwarted by intelligent dinosaurs? YOU DIDN’T KNOW THAT?!?! IF DINOSAURS HADN’T INTERVENED WE WOULDN’T BE HERE!!! THIS IS WHY DINOSAURS DESERVE OUR RESPECT!!!! That’s why to this very day we honor dinosaurs with…Dinosaur Day!

Happy (Belated) Dinosaur Day.

 

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5 “Alien” Crossovers That Need to Happen

Back in 1989, Dark Horse Comics published a story that had the antagonists of Alien meet the titular antagonists of Predator. From then on, the beasts battled bloodily in 36 more titles. Bet you didn’t know, that some of those crossovers included meetings with other characters like Batman (Batman/Aliens), Superman (Superman and Batman Versus Aliens and Predator Superman/Aliens), The Terminator (Aliens Versus Predator Versus The Terminator), Judge Dredd (Predators vs. Judge Dredd vs. Aliens) and Green Lantern (Green Lantern Versus Aliens). It doesn’t seem like there’ll be anymore crossovers in the near future (though the Predator was “lucky” enough to make an appearance in an Archie comic) which sucks because there’s so many juicy stories just waiting to burst out of the minds of writers involving the xenomorphs we all know and fear. So in honor of Alien Day, let’s look at some possible storylines for future Alien comics.

Alien vs. Jurassic Park

A Nightmare 65 Million Years In the Making. 

Back in 2012 there was a comic called Dinosaurs vs Aliens which depicted an extraterrestrial invasion in the Cretaceous Period (no affliation with Jurassic Park or the Alien franchise). Guess who won? So it only makes sense to have xenomorphs facing off (and bursting out of) against one of Earth’s most alien creatures. Are xenomorphs and velociraptors that different? It takes a lot of stealth to stay one step ahead of both species – who hunt in groups and answer to a matriarch. Or picture coming face to face with a xenomorph T. rex. Uh-oh.

Taking place after the events of Jurassic Park, the corporation that bribed Dennis Nedry still wants to cash in on John Hammond’s idea of a dinosaur park. They send in a team of wranglers, scientists and an agent to investigate Isla Nublar and possibly secure the island for themselves. During the investigation they come across a nest of suspicious looking eggs and the corpse of a T. rex with a gaping hole in its side…Will life find a way out of this one?

Star Wars/Aliens

Somewhere, in space, screaming could be happening right now.

I can picture this one written by Joe Schreiber thanks to his SW novels Death Troopers, Red Harvest and Darth Maul: Lockdown. However, I would prefer the story to take place during the Old Republic era because the thought of sith (before the Rule of Two) fighting xenomorphs – who are impervious to the Force – sounds dark, scary and exciting. Also it’s a good excuse to give Star Wars back into the hands (hooves?) of Dark Horse – for awhile.

Archie vs. Alien

There are some places in Riverdale you don’t go alone.

Look, Archie has to meet the Predator’s greatest rival sooner or later: somehow some xenomorph eggs end up in the school’s science lab. When a curious Dilton Doily or Moose Mason investigates he gets attacked by a face hugger, then during lunch students watch in horror as a chestburster eats its way out of Moose or Dilton and runs off. Because no one knows where it went all of Riverdale High is on lockdown until animal control finds the creature. By the time 6th period rolls around, more than half the faculty and a majority of the student body are dead. Is Archie, Jughead, Reggie, Betty and Veronica among the victims?

Aliens/War of the Worlds

They’re Already Here.

This version is the 2005 film directed by Steven Spielberg. Say whatever you want about the movie, you can’t deny that it captured the horror and suspense of Wells’ immortal novel. What happens when one of the “Martians” harvesting human victims accidentally pick up some xeno eggs and takes them aboard its tripod?

Jonah Hex vs. Aliens

Who says xenos can’t show up in the past and who better to come face to face with in the Old West than DC’s greatest gunslinger Jonah Hex? How will a man with less developed technology stand against these formidable “demons” in the desert wilderness? Can you imagine scenes where Hex has to hide out in a cave only to find one hanging above him? Or a panel where he sees some rock paintings bearing an eerie resemblance to the xenos? We may even get a glimpse of a xenomorph horse or, even better, a xenomorph alligator!

This is the Lady From Planet X, signing off. Happy Alien Day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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4 Reasons Why There Should Be A Xena Animated Series

Lucy Lawless recently said that she wants a Xena reboot because “it’s a wasted franchise.” Despite being off the air for 17 years, fans are still clamoring for a chance to see Xena and Gabrielle riding on the small screen once again. Others aren’t sure if lightning can strike twice. But fear not Xenites! I have a suggestion. The answer to all our problems lies here:

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No. I’m not saying you have to watch this film on a loop to get your Xena fix. I’m suggesting this: reboot Xena as a (hand drawn, thank you very much) cartoon show. What? You think that’s silly? Well that’s why I have a blog and you don’t. Here’s why there should be a Xena animated series.

1. It worked for other franchises.

Star Trek has an animated series. Star Wars has five animated series to date. They won awards and are embraced by fans as much as their live-action counterparts. With good scripts and talented artists, a successful Xena animated series is possible.

2. It allows for more creative freedom.

What if Xena and Gabrielle weren’t kept in suspended animation for 25 years? What if Eve didn’t grow up to become Livia because her mother was around? What if Xena met historical figures like Alexander the Great, Hannibal or Zenobia? What if Xena and Gabrielle got lost at sea and ended up finding the New World long before the rest of Europe did? What if the events of A Friend In Need never happened? You see, this series doesn’t have to be in the same timeline as the live-action series. You can do whatever you want and still stick to the “time of ancient gods, warlords and kings” but you can have the occasional modern episode a la “The Xena Scrolls” or “Deja Vu All Over Again”. Hercules, Iolaus, Joxer, Autolycus, Salmoneus, Ephiny and Cyrene can still make appearances along with new characters (since Kevin T. Smith died tragically in 2002, it’s debatable whether they should cast a new actor to voice Ares or retire the character). And speaking of appearances…

3. No physical demands on the actors.

Lucy Lawless is 50. Renee O’Connor is 47. Ted Raimi is 52. Kevin Sorbo is 59 and Michael Hurst is 60. Hudson Leick is 48. I don’t think these actors want to risk hurting themselves doing physical work the show demanded – even with stunt doubles. At the same time, I can’t picture any one else but the aforementioned actors playing their iconic roles, but they can voice the characters they made famous (and it would be fun to see other voice actors guest star on the show. Just imagine Ashley Eckstein or James Arnold Taylor making a guest appearance!). After all if 66 year old Mark Hamill can lend his voice to TESB Luke (and make it work), then Lucy Lawless can do the same.

 4. It can tone down the darker aspects of the show.

Now I don’t mean turning it into a saccharine kiddy show, but there are certain aspects of the show I wouldn’t be comfortable showing to little girls (“The Ides of March” anyone?). And I want to introduce little girls to Xena and see them embrace her the way they embrace Wonder Woman. But they have shows like DC Superhero Girls to introduce them to kinder and gentler versions of DC’s greatest female characters. There can still be action and adventure in the vein of, say, Justice League Unlimited or Batman: The Brave and the Bold, but without blood or scary moments. Again, with the right kind of writers, it’s possible to make a kid-friendly show that adults will love.

Well those are the only reasons I can think of. Any ideas you can add? Let me know in the comments.

 

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Filed under fantasy, female characters, feminism, television, tv superheros, Xena Warrior Princess

Adventures in Star Trek Fiction – Part 1

Star Wars publishing is known as the Expanded Universe/Legends. What do you call all the copious novels and anthologies that tie into the Star Trek TV franchise? Memory Beta? Voyages of the Imagination? Continuing Missions? I think that last one has a good ring to it…

Anyway, with all the mixed reactions to Star Trek Discovery, I think it’s time to look back on some good Trek stories that continued the missions of the U.S.S. Enterprise. Again, if your upset that your favorite books aren’t listed here, I apologize and you can always direct me to your site/twitter/whatever to show me your favorite tie-in novels.

Engage.

Note: with some exceptions, summaries are taken from the reference book Voyages of the Imagination: The Star Trek Fiction Companion by Jeff Ayers.

The Tears of the Singers (1984)

Melinda Snodgrass

The inhabitants of the planet Taygeta are seal-like creatures known for their beautiful song. In addition, they produce a jewel-like tear when they die. Hunters are commonplace and the killing needs to stop. A spatial rift near the planet has the Enterprise investigating along with the Klingons. Captain Kirk has recruited a famous musician to attempt communication with the creatures and Uhura falls in love with him. Can Kirk’s shipmates get along with the Klingons, stop the slaughter of the animals, and seal up the rift?

I love this book because it’s an Uhura-centric story revolving around her gift for music. When she uses that gift to help her crewmates, it makes for a memorable story. It also has a sympathetic female Klingon who befriends her and I like Klingons.

Uhura’s Song (1985)

Janet Kagan

On the planet Eeiauo, a decimating plague ravages its population of catlike beings. Uhura had visited the planet years before and befriended one of the inhabitants. The songs the two of them shared actually hold a secret that the Eeiauoans are willing to die upholding. When the plague crosses over to humans and Dr. McCoy becomes infected, the Enterprise crew must solve the mystery of the songs and cure the plague before everyone succumbs.

Interesting how one Uhura novel comes out a year after another, revolving around music once again. And it has two species of alien cats!

Federation (1994)

Judith and Garfield Reeves-Stevens

While Kirk and his crew struggle to free scientist Zefram Cochrane from captors, ninety-nine years in the future Jean-Luc Picard must rescue a mysterious individual who holds the key to the Federation’s ultimate survival.

A novel that intertwines the crew of The Original Series and The Next Generation into one epic story as they race to protect a fleeing scientist from an obsessed despot. The 1st Trek book I ever read – before I ever saw any of the shows. Good thing it was a really good book that kept me interested in the franchise. The two Enterprises even encounter each other at one point. *Sniff*. So beautiful.

The Eugenics Wars: The Rise and Fall of Khan Noonien Singh (2001 & 2002)

Greg Cox

In the twentieth century, an international cabal of scientists launches the Chrysalis Project, the development of an artificially enhanced breed of humans, while Gary Seven, an undercover operative for an advanced alien species struggles to neutralize the threat while watching the children of Chrysalis, including the brilliant Khan Noonien Singh, grow to adulthood.

Q-In-Law (1991)

Peter David

The Enterprise is chosen to host a wedding between two rival civilizations. One of the delegates attending the wedding happens to be Deanna’s mother, much to the chagrin of everyone else. When she meets Q and everyone warns her about him, that only attracts her to him more. Can Q, the most annoying being in the galaxy, find true love with the most annoying woman in the galaxy?

After reading this book, you’ll wish there were a TNG episode where the two meet. Or at least a production of Alien Voices

Spartacus (1992)

T.L. Mancour

Helping a damaged ship brings pain and grief to the crew of the Enterprise-D. The inhabitants of the Freedom call themselves Vemlans and they are fleeing a war-torn home, looking for a new place to live. A foggy picture gets even more blurry when an entire fleet from the planet arrives and claims that the Freedom crew are nothing more than escaped slaves. Picard must use all his cunning to fiddle with the Prime Directive if the Enterprise is to survive.

A good novel that delves into the ongoing question: what measure is a human. I won’t tell you what species the crew of the Freedom are.

Nightshade (1992)

Laurell K. Hamilton

Captain Picard, Worf and Deanna are negotiating for peace. The two factions are living on a dying planet. The Enterprise is sent away on another mission. The three of them are left alone to resolve the dispute. A murder occurs and Picard is accused of the crime. Now he resides in prison. Worf and Troi must discover the identity of the true killer. In the process, Worf learns to be a diplomat.

I don’t remember much of the plot but what stood out the most was seeing Troi and Worf’s working relationship evolve from slight mistrust to the beginnings of friendship as they work to solve the mystery.

Here There Be Dragons (1993)

John Peel

Investigating massive stellar phenomena, the crew rescues a man claiming to be a Federation Special Agent. He also has a strange story. Inside the cloud where nothing should be able to survive, hides an entire planet. With some advanced technology, the ship arrives to find a world of knights and serfs from Earth’s Middle Ages. While investigating, some of the crew are taken as slaves. Unknown to them all, the “gate” that got the ship there safely is starting to close…

Dragons and The Enterprise. What more could you want?

Death In Winter (2005)

Michael Jan Friedman

While Captain Picard supervises the retrofit and repair of the Enterprise after Shinzon’s attack, he also contemplates the departure of his friends, including Beverly, who is now the head of Starfleet Medical again. Beverly receives orders to conduct a clandestine mission to the planet Kevratas to help stop a plague with similarities to a disease she tackled years ago. Unfortunately, the Romulans control the populace and don’t want help. With Beverly captured and possibly dead, Picard realizes his true feelings for her and leads a covert mission of his own to not only stop the plague but rescue his true love.

This book is a must-read for all the fans who want the Crusher/Picard relationship to finally, finally get resolved.

The Captain’s Table: Where Sea Meets Sky (1998)

Jerry Oltion

Captain Pike tells the aliens at his table of an assignment to the Aronnia System. Upon arrival, the crew of the Enterprise finds giant whale-like creatures in space called Titans. Pike must make a horrific decision, since the creatures are vital to the survival of one culture, but are destroying another.

I’ve always had a soft spot for Captain Pike because of Jeffrey Hunter’s short, tragic life. It’s one of the biggest “if only’s” of sci-fi history. Despite only appearing in two episodes (if you count the two-parter “The Cage” as one episode), that character has lived on in lots of written works chronicling the early days of the Enterprise. Plus, SPACE WHALES! THAT EAT HYDROGEN! AND LAY EGGS! AND DROP THEM LIKE BOMBS!

Guises of the Mind (1993)

Rebecca Neason

The Enterprise receives an invitation to the coronation of the ruler of Capulon IV. In addition, the planet will sign a charter joining the Federation at the ceremony. Shuttling the religious order of Little Mothers to the event, one of the members, Mother Veronica, has telepathic powers she can’t control and begs for Troi’s help. On the planet, the future king’s evil twin brother kidnaps him and locks him in a dungeon. Can Picard bring the rightful heir to the throne?

Star Trek depicted a future where people (of Earth at least) were freed from the influence of religion. And we were all the better for it. This book on the other hand, deftly balances the positive aspects of religion without straying outside the boundaries of Roddenberry’s wishes. And still manages to be entertaining.

Grounded (1993)

David Bischoff

The rescue of a scientists in a remote station proves to be the end of the Enterprise. Infected with a mysterious substance on the surface of the ship, the stuff begins to gradually disintegrate the hull. Forced to evacuate, Picard’s crew must watch in horror as Starfleet orders the Enterprise’s destruction to prevent the infection of other vessels. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and the situation obviously warrants a bold plan for Picard to defy Starfleet and save his beloved ship.

This novel makes us realize that the Enterprise is more than just a starship, it’s home to the people that work on it.

Strange New Worlds I (1998)

Edited by Dean Wesley Smith, John J. Ordover and Paula M. Block

For 10 years Pocket Books held a contest where nonprofessional writers could submit stories that furthered the adventures of the characters of Star Trek (which at the time consisted of TOS, TNG, DS9 and VOY). The grand prize was a published piece in the Strange New Worlds anthology and a bonus advance of $1,000.00.

It appears I owe fan fiction an apology. I’ve always thought it to be way below authorized fiction. But after reading this anthology of published fan fiction, I will have to change my tune. These are some stellar stories. The ones I enjoyed reading are “A Private Anecdote”, “The Last Tribble”, “The Lights In the Sky”, “Reflections”, “The First”, “See Spot Run”, “Together Again, for the First Time” and “The Man Who Sold the Sky”.

Enterprise Logs (2000)

Edited by Carol Greenburg

Six centuries, ten captains. One proud tradition…

This anthology focuses on the many captains that led the adventures of the U.S.S. Enterprise. Of course they include Captains Kirk and Picard but they also feature stories about Captains April, Pike, Decker, Spock, Harriman and Garrett. Surprisingly the anthology also features two stories about captains of Earth-bound Enterprise (sea) ships. One during the American Revolution, the other during World War 2. Contributing to the anthology are talents like the late A.C. Crispin, Diane Duane, Greg Cox, Diane Carey and Michael Jan Friedman. My favorite stories are: “Though Hell Should Bar the Way”, “Conflicting Natures”, “The Avenger”, “Just Another Little Training Cruise” and “The Captain and the King”.

Strike Zone (1989)

Peter David

The Kreel have stumbled onto a planet with a storage facility full of extremely powerful weapons that could easily destroy the Enterprise-D. They begin using the weapons on the Klingons and now Picard has been asked to facilitate the dispute. Having both races on board the Enterprise calls for tact, something the Klingons and the Kreel are severly lacking.

The Klingons have mortal enemies? How interesting.

The Starship Trap (1993)

Mel Gilden

The Klingons attack the Enterprise in response to Federation assaults on Klingon vessels. Escaping with a promise of discovering the truth, Kirk and crew head to a secret rendezvous with a respected scientist. At the meeting with Federation personnel, the truth reveals itself. It seems that the Klingons are not the only race to have ships vanish, and it’s up to the Enterprise to uncover the truth.

The scientist in this story has shades of Captain Nemo.

Strange New Worlds IV (2001)

Edited by Dean Wesley Smith, John J. Ordover and Paula M. Block

Highlights include “A Little More Action”, “Prodigal Father”, “Missed”, “Tears for Eternity”, “First Star I See Tonight”, “Scotty’s Song”, “Flight 19” and “Prodigal Son”.

A Rock and a Hard Place (1990)

Peter David

The terraforming project on the planet Paradise has taken a turn for the worse. Commander Riker receives a temporary transfer to investigate this program. The person in charge of the project happens to be a childhood friend. Riker’s replacement on the Enterprise-D is Commander Stone, a man with a troubled past whose questionable methods have plagued his every posting.

I included this title here because the book has one of the most interesting – and frustrating – characters. Commander Stone is the guy that makes you say: “what’s his problem?” It keeps you guessing what his motives is until the end of the book: is he a villain who wants to destroy our heroes or is he a jaded anti-hero gone mad?

War Drums (1992)

John Vornholt

A small colony struggles to survive on the planet Selva. On their new home, a band of renegade Klingons fights for survival in the woods beyond the encampment. With aggression escalating between the two parties, the Enterprise arrives to render assistance and negotiate peace. Where did the Klingons come from and why did the colonists not notify Starfleet Command sooner regarding their situation? Prejudice and treachery intensifies.

As you can see I love any TNG story involving Klingons. I find them to be so fascinating because they’re so contradictory. Yet the more you find out about the feral Klingons in this story, the more you’ll pity them.

Strange New Worlds V (2002)

Edited by Dean Wesley Smith with John J. Ordover and Paula M. Block

I enjoyed “Disappearance on 21st Street”, “The Trouble With Borg Tribbles”, “Legal Action”, “The Peacemakers”, “Efflorescence”, “Kristin’s Conundrum”, “The Monkey Puzzle Box” and “The Farewell Gift”.

So there you have it, the first 20 Star Trek books worth reading. Let’s see if I can make it to the next 20. Or more.

 

 

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Women Against “The Last Jedi”

J.J. Abrams is the latest Lucasfilm employee to assume that fan backlash against The Last Jedi all boils down to good old-fashioned misogyny. This is pretty rich considering that the most successful movie of 2017 was Wonder Woman.

Three years ago I posted a list of negative fan responses to The Force Awakens. It’s my most viewed post to date. Someone suggested I do a follow up with The Last Jedi but I was at a loss for ideas.

Until now.

While on Twitter I came across a tweet (that’s been deleted) with the hashtag #WomenAgainstTheLastJedi. The woman who tweeted wanted to let everyone know that she was a woman who didn’t like TLJ. I loved it so much that whenever I came across a tweet of a woman’s (or girl’s) negative review of TLJ, I decided to retweet with that hashtag. Then I realized that it would be more productive to take every tweet, video or article I find and present them all on one blog post, updating as I find more evidence that women Star Warriors do not like The Last JediSome of them are feminists, some not so much, but all agree that this movie betrayed everything that made Star Wars special.

Enjoy:

Here are two articles that question the “feminism” of The Force Awakens:

“Rey From Star Wars is Overpowered and it’s Terrible for Feminism”

“Dear Lawrence Kasdan, So, You Say You Love Han Solo” (sadly this one has since been deleted, so here’s some excerpts)

Here’s a little something courtesy of Tumblr:

“‘Feminism’ in The Last Jedi (Or In Other Words, How Racism Has Been Cloaked in a Way to Appeal to the ‘Woke’ Millennial Demographic)”

Stormy Daniels had this to say about Rian Johnson and his “masterpiece”.

Fix yourself some snacks, sit back and watch these lengthy videos:

This lovely lady below has other videos critiquing The Last Jedi. View them all.

Here’s a little girl who gives an in-depth look into what went wrong: 

This insightful woman suggests that – gasp! – Star Wars was feminist before Disney came along.

A woman who grew up with The Original Trilogy gives her two cents:

You tell ’em, Anna!

Here’s three more videos:

A response to an asinine pro-Solo article from Dork Side of the Force (who are rrreeeaallyyy living up their name more and more).

And now for some tweets!

So as you can see the people at Disney/Lucasfilm (and the media) are WRONG and for them to hide behind the female sex as an excuse for their lousy films is cowardly and insulting to women, particularly female fans. If you are a woman reading this and you possess any tweets, videos, Facebook posts, Tumblr posts, or blog articles that slam The Last Jedi (or any of the other Disney Wars films) feel free to let me know in the comments and I will add your work to the list. Every voice counts.

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A Reply To “For the Sake of Fandom, Sanity and Star Wars”

On Monday, Coffee With Kenobi published a an article written by Lisa Dullard titled “For the Sake of Fandom, Sanity and Star Wars.” It is yet another plea for civility and kindness in the fandom post- Lucas. On Twitter, it has 18 retweets and 39 likes.

Yes, I agree civility is very important. Rest assured I would never berate, bully or hurt another fan’s feelings for liking The Force Awakens, Rogue One or The Last Jedi (heck, I helped a grandmother look for Rey and Phasma toys at Toys R US once). I do not blame the actors working on those films for the awfulness of those films. They were just doing their jobs.

But this article made me angry in so many ways I had to write this post immediately in response.Here’s what Ms. Dullard says in the first paragraph:

What I don’t understand is the constant drumbeat of negativity in fandom. It’s been there to some extent for a number of years, bubbling away. Most recently it’s become unglued, in my observation.

Rrrriiiiiggghhhttt.

From 1999 to 2015 I couldn’t pick up a magazine, be it Entertainment Weekly or Starlog, and not see some SW article bashing Lucas and the Prequels. I couldn’t look at any internet video or article referencing SW without the usual swipe at the Prequels (and to a lesser extent, the Special Editions). To this day the fake media continues the lie that all Star Warriors hate the Prequels. Even when Christopher Lee passed away, an obituary on RogerEbert.com had to call the prequels “dire” despite the fact that Lee admitted himself that he enjoyed working on them. And let’s not forget (as much as we want to) that horrendous “documentary” The People Vs. George Lucas.

I can’t believe that a certain subset of the Star Wars community – particularly those who run sites and podcasts – are now stepping up to the plate to defend some fans’ right to enjoy the current crop of Disney-made Star Wars films. But for nearly 21 years these same people were nowhere to be found when Star Warriors like me had to put up continuously with SE hate, prequel hate, EU hate, even Clone Wars hate from “unglued” fans who dared, DARED to equate the ’90s/’00s era of SW to rape. Where was the call for civility then?

Where were you when I needed you?

That’s why I find people’s recent attitudes so distressing. The attacks, not only on the films and the creatives behind them, but also on fellow fans who might feel differently, are just wrong.

Really? Were you distressed about Simon Pegg’s long running attitude about George Lucas and the PT (F.Y.I. Full of Sith came to his defense at one time)? Did you cringe when Wil Wheaton took an opportunity to publicly trash the PT at the premier of Rogue One? Did you see this man’s tweet?

And is it really the TLJ haters who are the bullies here? Look at how the media is smearing anyone who hated their precious Disney movie:

3 Ways Crybaby Star Wars Fans Are Trying To Ruin The Last Jedi For Everyone Else

Let’s Face It, You Hate The Last Jedi Because You Hate Women

Other’s are writing silly little “think pieces” analyzing TLJ hate because they just can’t wrap their minds around the fact that audiences disagree with critics:

The Backlash Against Star Wars: The Last Jedi Explained

Just How Seriously Should We Take This Star Wars: The Last Jedi Backlash?

Remember, these are the same people who sided with OT purists and never called them crybabies, bigots or losers.

And these “attacks” on the new films aren’t just a matter of taste, they’re a matter of principle. This trilogy has to be the most cynical trilogy in all of Star Wars history. It’s telling audiences – particularly children – that everything your heroes achieved in the first trilogy was a waste of time. The people you looked up to – Han, Luke and Leia – are failures that have to be killed off for a new generation of characters whose only personality traits are their skin color and sex. First The Force Awakens turns Han into a deadbeat dad – only to kill him off. Then The Last Jedi turns Luke into a snarky, apathetic coward – only to kill him off. A far cry from the men of Eps 4-6 who were willing to sacrifice their lives for the ones they loved. What lessons are these films teaching our kids?

What lesson will the upcoming Han Solo movie teach our children?

Now with Solo: A Star Wars Story, it’s all about how Alden Ehrenreich doesn’t look like Harrison Ford. How dare he! Seriously? He’s not meant to be Harrison, he’s meant to be Han Solo. As great as he was in the role, Harrison isn’t really Han, and he’d be the first to tell you that. Why not give Alden the room and support to put his stamp on the character? After all, he is playing a version of Han Harrison never did. It’s okay if it’s different.

Everyone is so willing, without hesitation, to embrace Donald Glover — who will be amazing as Lando, no doubt about it — but Alden is met with seemingly nothing but skepticism. I know, were I in Alden’s shoes, I’d be feeling a bit deflated right about now. I’m sure he busted his posterior to get his performance just right, and this should be an exciting time for him. Instead, fans gripe about how he looks or sounds and how he isn’t good enough. Is that really how we want to be?

Gee, I haven’t embraced Donald Glover as Lando Calrissian. Why have Lando in this movie when he still hasn’t shown up in Eps. 7-9? What happened to him after the Battle of Endor? I don’t think I want to know because they’ll just get Darth Aardvark to kill him off anyway.

Harrison Ford originated the role of Han Solo. He’s who we think of when we picture Han Solo. When we’re reading any printed SW story about Han Solo we read his lines in Harrison’s voice. If Burt Reynolds had been cast as Han, we’d feel the same way. It’s OK to cast different actors to play James Bond, Superman or Philip Marlowe because those characters began in literature. But guess what, there’s a physical requirement for those characters too. No one will accept a black James Bond (not even Idris Elba), an ugly Superman (*cough* Nicholas Cage *cough*) or a female Philip Marlowe because that’s not how the authors wrote them. 

But Star Wars didn’t start off as a book. It’s a visual medium.

George Lucas cast Harrison Ford because he read the script with a mix of mercenary swagger and world weariness. Sure, I could picture someone else voicing Han in a radio program or an animated featureBut that’s because Han is drawn/ designed to resemble…Harrison Ford! The actors voicing the character mimic Ford’s voice.

Now you may be wondering how I can accept Ewan McGregor as young Obi-Wan or Sean Patrick Flanery as young Indiana Jones but not Alden Ehrenreich as young Han Solo? Because there’s a bigger age gap between the first two characters. The Phantom Menace takes place 32 years before A New Hope. There’s a 28 year gap between The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles and Raiders of the Lost Ark. But Solo: A Star Wars Story looks like another lead up to A New Hope. There isn’t enough of an age gap. Harrison Ford was 33 when he was cast in ANH, Alden Ehrenreich is 28. That’s only 5 years apart. Not very convincing.

Another thing to keep in mind as we head toward Solo: Reserve judgment. We’ve seen around two minutes of footage and a few photos. That’s a far cry from seeing the finished product. Give Ron Howard, the cast, and crew a chance to deliver on their promise of a fun, exciting movie experience!

Well I saw the Super Bowl trailer and frankly, it looks like another forgettable Disney Star Wars project like the last three. Ron Howard’s last film (Heart of the Sea) was a massive flop. And why waste money on a film about Han’s early adventures when you could honor A.C. Crispin’s memory and pick up a copy (or copies) of The Han Solo Trilogy?

Anyway, I don’t know if anyone will read this, but if you did, I hope you’ll get comfort in knowing that it’s OK to publicly criticize The Last Jedi and Solo. I hope you’ll get comfort in knowing that it’s OK to pretend the Disney buyout never happened. The one bright spot in all this is that the days of prequel-bashing are coming to an end as more and more fans realize that Star Wars isn’t Star Wars without George Lucas.

For the sake of our fandom and our sanity, let’s uphold the Star Wars that truly matters.

May the Force Be With You.

 

 

 

 

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Great Whale Moments In SF History

Today is World Whale Day! As we use this day to think about how we can help out and appreciate our cetacean friends, I will take this opportunity to list all the whales that swam into our hearts via science fiction. So pour a glass of water, get out your copy of Songs of the Humpback Whale, and have a whale of a time perusing this list.

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Rorqual Maru, The Godwhale (1974)

Somewhat of a sequel to T.J. Bass’ Half Past Human, this novel is one of the earliest examples of “biopunk” a subgenre related to cyberpunk and steampunk but with biotechnology. Rorqual Maru (is that a cool name or what?) is the titular Godwhale, a cyborg/blue whale hybrid that helps the novel’s protagonist in his search for answers.

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The Leviathan, The Leviathan Trilogy (2009)

What if Britain & it’s allies used genetically modified animals to fight World War 1? Scott Westerfeld answers that question with the Leviathan, a giant airship made (literally) of a whale that can fly through the air (airwhale) thanks to a combination of animal genetics (because Darwin was able to crack the DNA code a century ahead of schedule). Whether you think this is ethical or not is up for debate.

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Orca, Batman

Introduced in Batman Issue #579 (2000)

Experiments with killer whale tissue turns marine biologist Dr. Grace Balin into Orca, one of Batman’s lesser known antagonists. More info on her here and here.

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Orka, Marvel Comics

First introduced in Prince Namor, The Sub-Mariner #23 (1970). With the help of his psionic amplifier belt, fallen Atlantean soldier Orka has the powers of a killer whale and uses those powers to fight various heroes in the Marvel universe (so why is he blue?) Read more about him here and here.

The Whaladon, Star Wars: The Jedi Prince Series (1992-1993)

First introduced in The Glove of Darth Vader, Whaladons are a species of intelligent creatures in the Star Wars galaxy that our heroes fight to protect from poaching. Detractors of the kids-centered books will summarize the series as “The Rebel Alliance Saves the Whales”. But hey, they can’t be worse than Aftermath, right?

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(The one under Kenix Kil’s foot is a Herglic.)

Herglic, Star Wars Legends

These sentient, bipedal, water-based aliens are native to the planet Giju and have appeared in various SW comics and role playing games throughout the years. They made their first appearance in Dark Force Rising, the 2nd book in Timothy Zahn’s beloved Thrawn Trilogy. Because of their large size, it’s difficult for them to enter buildings and ships causing much embarrassment. Nevertheless they are peaceful, easygoing creatures. You can read more about them here.

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Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986)

For all of Star Trek’s optimism, it seems illogical (no pun intended) that in the 23rd century humpback whales would be an extinct species. But they are and that’s bad for the crew of the Enterprise when they discover that a deadly probe is orbiting Earth. Spock comes to the conclusion that the “call” the probe sends matches the “songs” of humpback whales and will continue to wreak havoc until its call is answered. So the only solution is to go back in time to the 20th Century, capture some humpback whales, bring them forward in time to the 23rd Century and use them to respond to the probe’s signal. Not an easy task.

Didn’t they have a copy of Songs of the Humpback Whale on the Enterprise?

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Star Trek: Where Sea Meets Sky (1998)

Written by Jerry Oltion and part of The Captain’s Table Series. This is Captain Christopher Pike’s story. He and his crew encounter airwhales known as “titans” who, in Oltion’s words: “scooped hydrogen from the atmospheres of gas giants for food and laid their eggs on terrestrial planets.” Unfortunately this causes a lot of collateral damage to the inhabitants of the terrestrial planets so of course it’s up to the Enterprise to find a solution.

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Aiwha, Star Wars: Episode 2 – Attack of the Clones

Non-sentient cetacean creatures native to Kamino and Naboo, they can launch into the air from the sea. Their names are taken from the word “airwhale”. They were designed by Terryl Whitlatch though an early concept was made by Ralph McQuarrie for The Empire Strikes Back. You can learn more about them on Wookiepedia.

And now to conclude this list, here’s some pictures of space whales:

Image result for space whale Image result for space whale

Image result for space whale

And an air whale:

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10 Short Stories Worth Reading From “By Any Other Fame”

 51mkhmLqMcL._SX315_BO1,204,203,200_  Several leading lights among SF writers ask, What if some of the world’s greatest celebrities had taken different paths in life? We get such wacky, creative ideas as Toscanini as manager of the Yankees. Also notable are Kristine Kathryn Rusch’s similar story of Lillian Hellman as a senator; Michelle Sagara’s four versions of the same letter from Golda Meir to her sister in 1948, when she is acting prime minister of Israel; and Barry Maltzberg’s speculation on what would have happened had Hitler lived to stand trial at Nuremberg. Few of the stories, though, reach beyond the initial cleverness. Generally, however, this anthology ends up promising far more than it delivers.

Oh Publisher’s Weekly, I beg to differ. I  enjoyed 10 stories from the Mike Resnick & Martin H. Greenberg anthology, something I don’t always experience with alternate history. Some of these stories – unlike other works of alternate history – made me wish history had turned out differently (those titles will be in bold). Here are the 10 stories I enjoyed the most:

  • What if Humprey Bogart really was a private eye and Raymond Chandler was a famous actor playing private eyes? Fates collide in “Farewell, My Buddy” by Barbara Delapace.
  • How would’ve Gone With the Wind turned out if Groucho Marx had been given the role of Rhett Butler? You’d get “A Night On the Plantation” by Brian M. Thomsen.
  • When it comes to solving mysteries, everything’s coming up roses for detective Gypsy Rose Lee in “The Fifteen Minute Falcon” by George Alec Effinger.
  • Isadora Duncan gives up dancing to become a full-time race-car driver in “Dance Track” by Mercedes Lackey and Larry Dixon. Try to guess the identities of the two young actors Duncan takes under her wing. Go, on try.
  • One morning, as Franz Kafka heard the rattle of the red roach phone, he prepared himself to change into a monstrous verminous bug to face off against the evil Sigmund Freud, once and for all in “Franz Kafka, Superhero!” by David Gerrold.
  • What would you do if you were an art instructor and your favorite student insisted on wasting his time drawing little sketches of antropomorphic mice and ducks? As multiple Nebula-winner Nancy Kress demonstrates, it’s not all that simple a question when the student is a kid named Disney. The story is called “Ars Longa”.
  • What if Marilyn Monroe survived her drug overdose (let’s set aside those conspiracy theories for now), had a feminist awakening, became Governor of California and then President of the United States? Beth Meacham chronicles her political career in the memorable “A Dream Can Make A Difference“. Very timely in the #MeToo era.
  • What if Helen Keller was not born deaf, mute and blind but her sister was? Janni Lee Simner answers that question in “Out of Sight”.
  • Do have a question about a certain tapestry? Mother Mae West has the answer. Come up and see her sometime in “Mother Mae I?” by Lawrence Schimel.
  • Does Wallis Simpson have the ability to change history? Any history? One young man will find out the hard way in Dean Wesley Smith’s “A Bubble For A Minute.”

So if you’ve read By Any Other Fame, tell me which stories you enjoyed reading. If you’re not familiar with this book, pick up a copy today.

 

 

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The Best-Dressed Ladies of Genre Fiction

Syfy Wire wrote a piece listing who they think are the best-dressed ladies of sci-fi and fantasy. While I appreciate the (fangirl) writers of this article for making Padme Amidala #1 in the fantastic fashion department, the other choices were, meh, to say the least. So to remedy that, I put together my list of the best dressed ladies of genre fiction. The only criteria is this: they must make at least two costume changes over the course of their story.

padme-amidala-costume Star-Wars-Clone-Wars-Micro-Series-2003-image-star-wars-clone-wars-micro-series-2003-36179378-445-297 9bfc2986fe028a81034f1f23639dfcc5

1. Padme Amidala, Star Wars

When we first met Padme in The Phantom Menace, she was the 14-year-old Queen of Naboo and went by her middle name Amidala. She wore huge robes that covered her entire body, elaborate headdresses and white face paint. Why? Protection! Thanks to this queenly facade, whenever Amidala was in danger she could switch places with her low-key but equally fabulous handmaidens and no one would be the wiser. When I was a high school freshman, my female classmates and I would gab enthusiastically about which Amidala dress was our favorite. Then came Attack of the Clones and Amidala was now a senator. No more heavy dresses, no more elaborate hairstyles, now her wardrobe was more flowing and romantic. But the fashion sense was still there. If anything, being senator of Naboo meant…more dresses! Then in Revenge of the Sith Padme had to fall back on her queenly roots again as she used full bodied gowns to cover her pregnancy. But hey, the movies weren’t the only ones to showcase Padme’s unique style. Who can forget that fur-lined “snow bunny” outfit she wore when she went to Illum with Yoda in Clone Wars?

Number of Costume Changes (counting films and television only): 50

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2. The Ladies of The Avengers

No I’m not talking about the 2012 film or the Marvel comic. I’m talking about the hipper British TV show that ran from 1961 to 1969. For nine years John Steed – played by the sophisticated Patrick Macnee – would fight diabolical, dastardly villains with wit, a smile, a derby and an umbrella. Along side him was always an equally competent lady partner. From 1962-1964 it was Cathy Gale (Honor Blackman). From 1965-1968, when the series switched from black and white to color, it was Emma Peel (That’s Dame Diana Rigg to you). Then in the final season (1968/1969) it was Tara King (Linda Thorson). Each woman had her own personal style and if there was one thing The Avengers had in abundance, it was style! Whether it was Cathy’s black leather catsuits (and “kinky boots”), Emma’s Mod ensembles or Tara’s youthful miniskirt’s, these ladies brought new meaning to the phrase: “dressed to kill”. Watch all 161 episodes to see them all.

3. Altaira Morbius, Forbidden Planet (1956)

The first big budget science fiction film ever made, this 1956 smash hit influenced every sf creator, from Gene Roddenberry and Irwin Allen to George R. R. Martin. So it shouldn’t surprise us that costumes were a part of the budget, the most memorable being Altaira’s (Anne Francis) self-designed dresses and jewelry. When we first meet Altaira, she’s wearing no shoes, amber/ruby jewelry and – gasp! – a minidress. This was before Mary Quant made waves with her mini skirt design. In fact Altaira’s hemline was so ahead of its time, the film wasn’t shown in Spain until 1967. To impress Commander Adams (Leslie Nielsen. Yes, that Leslie Nielsen), she switches to longer dresses with emeralds around her neck. But by the end of the movie she’s back to her short skirts. Good thing she has Robby the Robot to provide the materials.

Number of Costume Changes: 4

4. Wonder Woman

Throughout her 76 years as The First Lady of Comics, Wonder Woman has gone through many wardrobe changes, from culottes to skirts, and eagle to W breastplates. What’s never changed is the color scheme of her armor: red, blue and gold. But let’s not forget her other wardrobe choices: on Themyscira she wears a loose, short athletic tunic for freedom of movement. When going about her daily business in Man’s World as Diana Prince, she chooses an elegant, classy style (mostly pantsuits). When acting as Ambassador for the Amazons, she wears a classical toga. If we were to discuss every outfit Diana has worn – from comics to cartoons to live action – we’d be here all day.

5. Marsha, Queen of Diamonds, Batman (1966)

Former Addams Family matriarch, Carolyn Jones, committed her first crime in Gotham City as the glamorous Marsha, Queen of Diamonds. This diva loves diamonds. She loves diamonds so much that she’ll cast a spell (using her Aunt Hilda’s love potion) on any man to make him steal a diamond for her. But the one diamond she wants more than anything is the Bat Diamond, which generates power for the Batcave. Marsha appeared in five episodes of Batman wearing – what else – diamond jewelry but also some memorable outfits to go with that ice. What other woman would make giraffe print look so good?

Number of Costume Changes: 9

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6. Dale Arden, Flash Gordon (1980)

From one comic book wardrobe to another: Both ’60s Batman and ’80s Flash Gordon were scripted by the same writer: Lorenzo Semple Jr. so it makes sense that the projects were full of camp, colors and great costumes. It’s no surprise that the beautiful Dale Arden (Melody Anderson) would catch the eye of wholesome quarterback Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones) while wearing a coral colored dress with a white jacket. As she (unwillingly) becomes Ming’s prisoner/bride to be, she’s dressed in glittery orientalist-inspired gowns (pointed shoulder pads!) and intricate diadems. But no flashy (no pun intended) apparel can stop her from helping Flash save the universe!

Number of costume changes: 6

7. Peggy Carter, Agent Carter (2015-2016)

Agent Carter, we hardly knew ye. If your show had stayed on the air, who knows how many more fashions we’d see on this secret agent as the world moved on from World War 2 to the early stages of The Cold War (screw you, Disney). One thing’s for sure, we saw a lot of memorable outfits in the two seasons of this beloved show. Peggy proved that you can kick butt in heels and a skirt without smudging your lipstick. Who didn’t want to wear a red hat at a jaunty angle after the first episode? Or go to bed with your hair curled in bobby pins to get that wavy look the next morning? Or work at the office in a pinstripe pattern? Heck, raise your hand if you wished you had a time machine that could take you back to 1946 for a shopping spree and a makeover? View them all in 18 swingin’ episodes.

Agree with my list? Who are your favorite fashion divas of science fiction and fantasy?

 

 

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10 Things Every Woke Geek Girl Should Ask On a First Date

Disclaimer: this is a parody. It was inspired by this article at Feminist Current which in turn is a parody of this ridiculous article at Everyday Feminism. After reading both, I decided to have a little fun and write one of my own. Don’t worry readers. I’m not drunk, I haven’t been abducted by aliens and I’m not turning into a Social Justice Armchair Warrior.

Enjoy.

As a woke geek girl, I keep close relationships with geeks and nerds of all sizes. They’re true accomplices in the fight against the average jock, stoner and hipster. If you’re not going to support science fiction, then we can’t be friends, let alone date. The fantastical is political.

Beyond the words, happiness and support that we receive from imaginary characters (which are, in all honesty, soul-feeding and essential), geek girls also date! But there are questions we have to ask before we get close to someone.

The following list of questions is applicable to all relationships – and certainly not just between Trekkies and Whovians.

1. Do You Believe Jedi Lives Matter?

Yes? Wonderful. Let’s start here. There are three categories that are non-negotiable to me: Jedi, Padawans and Masters. Not everyone understands how you can sit on the council and not be given the rank of Master, but anyone who doesn’t take the time to learn how the Jedi Order works isn’t going to care about how the Force affects me or people who have a higher midi-chlorean count than I do.

I don’t want to have to have laborious discussions where I have to prove to someone that Force sensitivity or Force immunity exists. If they are willing to learn and listen and make the space to decenter their Force immunity (if they have a low midi-chlorean count) that’s a good place to start.

2. What Are Your Thoughts on Hard Sci-Fi and Soft Sci-Fi?

The Mohs Scale of Science Fiction Hardness is a tiny box and I wish it didn’t exist but it does. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone who is hard on soft sci-fi. One of the many elements to dismantling the Mohs scale is to abolish the limited understanding that we have about hard and soft science fiction. As a woke geek girl, it would be a betrayal of what I stand for.

3. How Do You Work to Dismantle the Rivalry Between Marvel and DC?

I’ve met Marvel fans (Marvfa) who hate DC fans. They say they love DC fans, but that love is conditional on not having their cinematic universe threatened in any way. And they love us as an Infinity Gauntlet, they love what DC fans have to offer, whether it is sex, food, love, free comics or money to spend on collectibles: they love us for what we can do for them, not because of who we are for ourselves. It is crucial for Marvfa men to learn how to decenter their love of Marvel in order for them to understand the DC Multiverse.

Beyond the New 52, does the person you are with understand Earths 1, 2 or 23? Are they willing to learn if they don’t? Walk away from anyone who thinks that Barry Allen is the only Flash.

4. What Are Your Thoughts on Cosplay?

You may scratch your head at this one but being pro-cosplayer is a necessary pillar of sticking it to the cool kids. I don’t mean pro-cosplayer in the sense where non-cosplayers reblog pictures of cosplayers on Tumblr or Instagram.

I mean the kind where we pass the mic to cosplayers because they know their experiences better than anyone who hasn’t ever engaged in cosplay, where you understand the labor of cosplayers, especially cosplayers who dress as Steampunks because their experience and knowledge is crucial to understanding geek fashion sense.

5. Are You a Supporter of the Metric System?

The metric system stands for meters of all sorts: centimeters, milimeters, kilometers and so on. I grew up with the standard (non-metric) system in the U.S. Before even understanding how to measure by inches and pounds, I understood that the U.S. was way behind the rest of the world in its approach to measuring things.

Eventually, I began to understand the terror, trauma and stress of having to convert inches to centimeters, simply because one nation refuses to step in line with the rest of the world. Being pro-metric system is not the same as being anti-standard system. I shouldn’t even have to express that, but being pro-metric and standard is one step closer to world peace and understanding.

6. What is Your Understanding of Cryptozoology?

Your date thinks Mothman is a hoax or a relic of the past? NO THANKS. A key part of X-Files fandom is having a complete understanding of how historical and current sightings of Mothman effected the lives of thousands of people, regardless of skeptics and naysayers refusing to believe.

7. Do You Think We Should Clone Dinosaurs?

Should we clone only the plant eaters to be safe? Should we also clone meat-eaters because they look cool? If we exclude one class of dinosaurs will that make us carn-exclusionary? How would that make other extinct/prehistoric animals feel if we only clone dinosaurs? These are important questions to ask yourself if you want to continue to date a woke geek girl.

8. Can Any Alien Be Illegal?

We live on a tiny planet, with land and water within a galaxy surrounded by a universe with an inconceivable number of other galaxies and planets. Yet here we dictate where we are and who is allowed to be where we are. It’s mind-boggling that planets are even a thing, so to call visitors from other planets “aliens” or “UFOs” is so inhumane and despicable.

Earthlings stole this planet, populated this planet, polluted this planet, pushed out, killed and domesticated animals and somehow they have the audacity to claim this planet is theirs and that green and grey non-Earthlings are the abductors? Miss me with that baloney.

9. Do You Support Klingons?

I can’t think of any other race of humanoids which has been vilified and lied about more than Klingons. I am not a Klingon, so I will stay in my space-lane, but I cannot imagine for a second claiming to be a woke geek girl if I didn’t stand in solidarity with my Klingon friends and family – especially after Star Trek Discovery.

Don’t waste your time and energy on dating someone who thinks Klingons are crafty and violent. Instead read the works of Kahless the Unforgettable, you baktag!

10. Does Your Allyship Include the Fair Folk?

As a human woman, again, I will stay on my garden path, but geek/nerd culture has to include a solid platform for the Fair Folk – and not just the ones with wings. If you have fairy/faery family or friends, please make the effort to listen and learn about their lives and experiences. Fairy folk are subject to traps and disbelief because humans lack empathy and just plain suck. Be mindful of others who mock fairies; that kind of cruelty is inexcusable.

On a date with someone who doesn’t believe in fairies? Walk away clapping your hands vigorously.

 

 

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